Today when I woke up, I was reminded yet again of growing. Sitting quietly by the window was my potted plant we received in sunday school. For the past week, it seems like it has stopped growing since the initial growth spurt when it germinated a week or so ago.

I think this reflects quite evidently so in my life, ever since the holidays ended a week ago. It's like once school starts, everything that I was inspired by faded away. The eagerness quietly slips away and spiritually I ceased growing. And this has gotten me pretty down these few days.

This happens, basically, when no one is there to be encouraged by. After all the activities that had happened in June, the sudden absence of close contact leaves me lost where I stand while others move on. And although all of us meet almost every weekend, I'm afraid it's fast becoming just a motion to me again.

Yeah, I'm afraid. I'm afraid about so many things. And I was just reminded again of the prelims and the big O's coming.. So once again I've got this shit feeling in me, that so many things need to be done but the only thing holding me back is myself. But I guess there's always time to grow?


The only thing holding me back is myself

Gareth Chin
3 April 1991
Child Of God, YF'er!
Music, guitar, jamming
Brown, cream
gar3th_3@hotmail.com
St. Gabriel's Secondary


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