It just dawned on me that I may have more than what I can handle.

School's over. Hooray? I think not. I don't know why but it's just bad even though I haven't been doing much in school anyway. I feel like I've been bagged up and left outside the school gate. "Well, it's been good knowing you these four years. You're on your own now, see you in three weeks." Yeah, that's how I feel. Like how I didn't want to let go of my mom on the first day of kindergarden school.. You get the idea.

I've collected the question paper for Art paper 1 today. That means in exactly 3 weeks from now, I'll be sitting in the art room drawing for my life. Kinda sucks that we've gotta do all this prep-work all over again.. But again I try convince and re-assure myself that I have no regrets whatsoever for taking up art. It's only been a few weeks ago but already I have forgotten the joy of squeezing every bit of creativity left in me at 4 in the morning. And honestly I use "joy" because joy is what I felt when the music was blasting and pencil was being put to paper that night/morning. But that "joy" could have just been the high from marker fumes.. Weird, huh?

Ms Ong called me up recently to clarify some stuff about "the band" and the performences we had in the past for some testimonial thing. So I was tasked with digging up the details of what we had accomplished as a band. Thankfully, all the details could be found in the previous posts in my blog.. Although there isn't much, it's still there alright. Looking back only made me realise how much I miss those days. As gut-wrenching and hectic as it was, I wouldn't miss a chance to have a second go at those days; save for the metal and emo-core-whatever.

Right now I'm just experiencing a mix emotions from this sudden rush of study, realisation and Switchfoot :) Isn't there a whole outside that each and everyone is entitled to explore and travel? Yet here we are caged up in this little thing we call Education. Part of me knows that here, education is more or less the only way to "ensure a bright and sunny future". But part of me is for the "less". Part of me only wants to believe that life is more than education. Maybe it's just me wanting to be in someone else's shoes right now. But oh boy,
do I wanna jam right now!
I know everyone says that being in the local music scene will never ever put bread on your table, but is there not that chance of ever? Part of me wants to devote my life to make that chance happen.

Sure, there'll be that looong(I'm not complaining, mind you) holiday after the O's for us to . What about after that? What's next in life? It'll all start again; that whole cycle- only in a much bigger scale I guess.

Sometimes, I'd really give anything to be in someone else's shoes. Anything, literally. What would you give in exchange for the freedom to do whatever you want and to be so damn good at doing it?

Well there's still much more to write/rant/whine about, but I'll save it for another time.

And in case you don't know, Switchfoot rocketh my socketh !

Gareth Chin
3 April 1991
Child Of God, YF'er!
Music, guitar, jamming
Brown, cream
gar3th_3@hotmail.com
St. Gabriel's Secondary


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